Parent-teacher conferences are coming up. Our school has a new process where we now have the option of scheduling our own times. This is so incredibly convenient! I was able to schedule them right on top of each other, counting on the hope that I can leave one a few minutes early so I can get to the second at the next school. But I’ve had conferences scheduled before where they are hours apart. And the only way I can attend is on my lunch break. Hours apart never worked for me and I would end up begging the teachers for a time change that would be convenient for all of us. This new system is genius.

Parent-teacher conferences always strike mixed reactions in me. When I sit down with my daughter’s teacher, I hear stories about what a pleasure it is to have her in class, how she helped a student who needed it, that she is smart and articulate, and how she always has her homework in on time. Occasionally they’ll tell me that she needs a little help in being more organized (I don’t know where she gets that from, *cough cough*), or that she is a little bit too social during class time, or even that she is so smart that she is capable of straight A’s despite the single B on her report card. But being that my daughter does all her own school work and reports with minimal help from me, I am proud of her and all her accomplishments.

My son, on the other hand, is a whole other story. I am never sure what the teacher is going to say. His kindergarten teacher mentioned his high energy and inability to pay attention in class. And she asked me if he had ADD (he doesn’t, according to the counselor he was seeing at the time). His first grade teacher didn’t say much of anything all year long about his behavior one way or the other, but seemed very unattached to him altogether. His second grade teacher told me that my son was a loving, special boy who was an absolute treasure, and possibly the smartest boy in class. And then she sent home papers upon papers that had the words “Messy”, or “Do over” on them, and pink slips of paper that told of his latest misbehavior that had him making friends with the principal once again.

This year is different, and I am actually positively anticipating the conference. This is the first year that my son is actually looking forward to school. He loves his third grade teacher, the first male teacher he has ever had. He talks about his teacher all the time. “Mr. M taught us about zombies today and then we got to act like them in a video!” “Mr. M said that I would be perfect as a Conflict Manager or on Student Council!” “Mr. M said I can call him at home if I have any questions about the homework. Can I call him now?” I ask him every day about school, including if he behaved. And so far it seems that there have been no problems.

But there is still a little bit of fear. What if this teacher also views my son as a holy terror? What if there are still trips to the principal that I am not hearing about through my son? What if this teacher is regretting my son’s presence in his classroom and is contemplating a transfer to make the class a more peaceful place?

What if this teacher doesn’t see how great my son really is?

I love my son. I mean, of course I do, I’m his mom. But I truly see how kindhearted and special he is. Sure, he can lean towards the annoying side, especially when he is bored. He might have a tendency to want to hear himself talk at ALL HOURS OF THE DAY, making noise just to make noise, and have a sound effect for every single action he puts forth. He might make messes in my cleanest rooms, spill jelly on the floor and leave it, and throw his clean clothes in the hamper because he doesn’t want to be bothered to put them in his drawers. He might tease his sister mercilessly and then come crying to me when she punches him in the arm “for no reason at all”. He might cry that we don’t need anything when he thinks he has to go to the grocery store with me, and then come up with a whole list of things he needs there when he finds out he doesn’t have to go. He might disappear when I need chores, tear up his very expensive skateboard by scraping it all over the ground, and wear holes in his new shoes by using his feet as brakes.

Where was I?

Oh yeah. Kindhearted and special. I have never seen my son be purposefully mean to another kid, as long as that kid isn’t his sister. He is a chameleon when he plays with other kids, playing to their level. This is incredible to watch when it comes to younger kids. My rambunctious boy will suddenly become incredibly gentle, playing whatever game the younger kid wants to play without complaint. Yes, even my friend’s 4-year old daughter gets her way when she wants to play Littlest Pet Shop or Tea Party with my 8-year old son. My son is smart, even though he doesn’t like to put forth the effort in trying his hardest. He can read at a 9th grade level, yet prefers to try younger books because they are easier to remember the plot to. Right now, though, he is attempting to read the first Harry Potter book, only because it holds the most AR points. I’m nervous about it, but he’s determined so I will let him.

Will his new teacher see all this, how great my son really is? Will he play to my son’s strengths and encourage him in his weaknesses? Will he let the class outside to burn off that extra energy when the afternoon brings on wiggly 8 year old bodies? Will this teacher be sure to praise my son often so that he wants to continue doing his best?

Parent-teacher conferences are in 2 weeks, so stay tuned for the results…….

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Can a toddler comfortably share a room with a newborn baby? Help a soon-to-be mother make some important decisions in living arrangements before her second child is born.