The day could not have been going better.  After a morning workout, I woke the kids up right on time.  And they got up without a fuss.  I made their breakfast, and by 7:05 they were already in their chairs, dressed, and eating Cream of Wheat.  I worked on getting my hair and make-up done.  Without having to be asked, they cleared their places, and then made their own lunches.  We got out the door early, all backpacks packed up and my son’s baseball gear all together.  I dropped them each off at school and made it to work a little early.  I had a busy day in store for me, and I mentally went over each task to prepare myself in what needed to be done.  After a morning meeting, I delved into all tasks at once. I was on par.  I was in a great mood.  Nothing could bring me down.

Of course, this is where the story always changes, doesn’t it?

As I was on the phone with one colleague, my cell phone rang.  It was a number I didn’t recognize.  I ignored it and let it go to voicemail.  Then my office phone rang.  I ignored that too, but was aware by now that it was probably my daughter calling for forgotten homework or lunch as usual.  She is infamous for calling every phone I have until I eventually pick up.  My cell phone rang again, and I finally told my colleague to hold on while I answered it.

“Hello?” I asked.

“Ms. Dillon?  This is your daughter’s teacher.”

“Hi,” I said tentatively, caught off-guard.

“Your daughter is in the office right now.  She has a really bad pain in her side and is crying.”

My attention was all hers.  For my daughter to cry over pain to her teacher meant that she was seriously hurt.  I thought back to the pain she had been feeling over the weekend, the same pain that I had dismissed as a pulled muscle from a back bend she had attempted, or possibly a premenstrual cramp since she was getting to that age, or even just plain old growing pains.  And I suddenly felt ashamed as her teacher went on.

“I think she might have a kidney infection, and should probably go to the emergency room.”

This is my accident prone daughter.   She has had her head sliced open by a wagon, two near concussions, a broken arm at school, cuts, bruises, sprains……  In her 11 years, she has seen the ER 4 times, and been in an ambulance once.  So a call from her teacher that was warranting another visit to the ER was not shocking.  But it was overwhelming.  I was suddenly aware of how alone I was in getting everything done and also be able to be at her side when she needed me.  This pain that she had, it had subsided over the weekend.  And to know that it was suddenly worse scared me.  And what made me feel like an awful mother was the thought that was rising above the rest.

Why now?

I had so much work to do, so much that was on deadline.  And I was torn.  I knew where I needed to be – with my daughter.  But I also knew that I had a lot that needed to be done.  My phone was ringing off the hook, papers were piling up, time was slipping away.  And my daughter was laying down in an office at school, in pain, and waiting for her mom to make her feel safe.

If I could have torn myself in a million pieces to allow me to go in a million different directions, I would have.

I called the hospital and described her symptoms.  The nurse asked me a lot of questions that I was able to answer, and even more that I couldn’t since I wasn’t with my daughter.  She then voiced her concern over appendicitis. 

What????

My head was swimming.  Appendicitis.  If that were really the case, and she had been in pain all weekend, that mean that it could burst.  So it could be an almost ruptured appendix, or a kidney infection, or growing pains, or a pulled muscle, or premenstrual cramps.  In that moment of not being able to see straight, of thinking about all the work I had to finish, the baseball snacks I still needed to buy to get to the game that evening, all the deadlines that were looming and slipping away, and with my daughter possibly getting worse by the minute, there was nothing left to do but march straight into my boss’ office. 

And cry. 

Ugh, yes.  I melted down.  I had an ugly, messy, unapologetic (mostly) cry as she stared at me in wonder.  She then grabbed a pen and paper to see what needed to be done.  Together we went over every task of my day and doled them out to the various people who could get it done.  And then she told me to leave.

When I got to my daughter’s side, she smiled weakly at me.  I gave her a hug, signed her out and got her into the car.  I drove in the direction of the hospital as I dialed the Advice Nurse again on speakerphone.  Together, we went over her symptoms, this time with much more clear information.  We were able to rule out appendicitis (thank god!), and narrowed it down to possibly a kidney infection, and maybe just a pulled muscle.  It was then that my daughter interrupted with an observation of her own.

“Well, I was running at the time that the pain came back.”

Suddenly it all made sense.  And the nurse and I realized at the same time that this was most definitely a case of a pulled muscle.  Just in case, we set up an appointment for later that afternoon.  I brought her home to rest on the couch, and I was able to return to work and finish up before taking her to the appointment.  $30 in co-pays and x-rays, and an hour later, an amused doctor told us what we already knew – pulled muscle.  We were free to go and were able to get to the game in time to see my son play, soccer snacks in our possession thanks to my caring boyfriend who bought them for me, and my son already up to bat thanks to an ex-husband who is getting better and better at the dad role.

Were lessons learned?  You bet.  First off – ASK LOTS OF QUESTION, “What were you doing when you felt that pain?” being the primary question.  And “Where exactly does it hurt?” (I didn’t know if it hurt from the front or the back, up high, or down low.  That kind of makes a huge difference in the prognosis.).  Get all information before you overreact.  If I had known she had been running, and I had already suspected a pulled muscle, I would have told her to lie down in the office and I would get her when I was done, or she could just go back to class and take it easy for the rest of the day.  But even still, when it comes to our kids it is never wrong to play it safe and react with caution. 

The other lesson I learned is what phone numbers I really needed in my phone.  The number of our doctor, of the Advice Nurse, and of Admissions to the ER.  The number of all co-workers who could have come to work and filled in for me.  And the number to the school office (I did have this, though they called from a different line upon trying to reach me).  Upon having to research the number to the Advice Nurse while driving down the freeway, you better believe that I have THAT number now programmed into my phone!

She’s fine today, Emergency Room averted…..this time!  And she is armed with a note excusing her from P.E. for the rest of the week to ensure healing.   The morning went a lot slower than yesterday, and my daughter even left her lunch in the car when I dropped her off.  I had to go back to her school in my slippers since I hadn’t finished getting ready for work yet.  But maybe that means that the rest of the day will be calmer.

Do you have an accident prone child?  What are your tips and lessons learned?  And have they named a ward after your precious child yet (I’m still waiting on the plaque)?

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